Big Questions

My husband asks big questions.  While I’m spending my mental energy on deciding what to have for dinner, he’s pondering the purpose of creation.  As I’m trying to figure out the best way to organize the baby’s room, he’s wondering what existed before creation.  While I’m in the shower, my attention is focussed on not nicking my legs with the razor.  He’s imagining the physics of Heaven.

I love the way he thinks, and I love the way he writes.  He just put up a new post on his blog, Purposeful Creation.  You should check it out!  Also, if you missed his second post, Repentance, I highly recommend it.  I think that’s my favorite of his posts so far.

Second Guessing My Diagnostic Abilities

Our eldest has been suffering from a fever, sore throat, cough, and general tiredness.  While I’d normally just make him tough this out, we were a bit concerned, because these are the same symptoms my husband exhibited when he came down with pneumonia over Christmas.  Out of curiosity, I listened to his chest to see if I could hear the same “squeak” that I could hear from my husband’s lungs when he was sick.  While I didn’t hear the same high-pitched squeak, I did hear a lower one.  I called the nurse, explained what was happening, and she said they definitely want to see him today.

Ten minutes later, I listened to his chest again, and the squeak was gone.  Not looking forward to walking in to the office and saying, “Um…hi!  Yeah…uh….he HAD a squeak.  Really, he did!”

It’ll be just like the time when he was five months old and aspirated some spit-up.  He started going rigid and would stop breathing for a few seconds, so we called 911.  By the time we got to the hospital, he was fine again.  The ER doctor looked him over and then said, “You are first-time parents, yes?”  D’oh!

Yawn!

I’m a boring person.  I’ve had the desire to write.  I’ve even had the time to write.  But I’m absolutely lacking in topics.  (Unless you want to hear me whine about my chocolate withdrawal.  Or hear about the contractions I had for two hours this morning.  Yawn!) 

I will say that this has been a long, emotional week!  We’ve been wrestling with a tough decision for over a year now and have finally started sharing some details with our friends.  While we don’t know what God’s will is for us in this area, we are blessed by the outpouring of love & support that we’ve received this week. 

I’ll also mention that I kicked my (sick) son’s little hiney in Monopoly today.  Because that’s the kind of mom I am. 

Silly Boy

Youngest:  “Daddy, can you teach me how to be a man?”

Daddy:  “Well, buddy, that’s not something I can teach you in one sitting.  It’s something I try to teach you every day.”

Youngest:  “Maybe you can teach me next Saturday.”

Oh, for a video camera

There’s no way this will translate to written form, but I found it quite hilarious.

Our dog eats stuff when he’s annoyed with us.  We came home two days ago to find that an unfortunate plastic fire fighter had met his demise.  Thank goodness for dental records, because he was…well…I don’t need to share the details.

One of the dog’s favorite snacks is used kleenexes.  (Gross, I know.)  He’s been visiting the trash can in our bedroom more and more frequently, and finally my husband had had enough.  We walked into the bedroom this evening to discover the dog with his nose in the trash.  For the second time today.  My husband decided that it was time the dog learned to fear the trash can.

He picked the trash can up and then proceeded to lunge toward the dog, growling menacingly.  He did this multiple times and then started to chase the dog around the room with the can, growling all the while.  The dog was, of course, completely freaked out by the trash can come to life.  He ran around with his tail between his legs, barking over his shoulder.

It got to the point where all hubby had to do was turn toward the dog and hold out the can, and the dog would dash away.  I sat watching the whole thing, laughing so hard that I had tears running down my face.  Not only was it fun to see the dog, whose life’s aim is to annoy me, terrorized, but my husband and his angry growls were very amusing.

If only I’d had the video camera.

Control

I was reading a post today where the author was agonizing over the situation in Haiti.  One reason it bothered her so much was because she knew the parents there must feel that they have little control over their children’s lives right now.  Little control over what they will eat, where they will live, what will happen to them.  One paragraph stuck out to me:

But what I really wish I could give to Haitians today is something I cannot donate: control over their own lives. My worst fear when it comes to my own children and family is that something will happen to them that I am powerless to stop. I’ve felt it in airplanes and in cars and on the other rare moments in which I have to relinquish control to someone or something else. It doesn’t happen often, because most of the time–nearly all of the time–I feel command over my family’s well-being. I feel able to protect them and care for them, and I know my husband feels able to clothe them and feed them.

This is something I struggle with in regards to my own family.  I like to be in control.  I absolutely hate following my children if they’re riding in a car with someone else.  I don’t like other people picking them up from school, because they have to drive on some less-than-ideal roads.  I won’t leave them with teenaged babysitters.  I often feel that if I am in control, they are safe, and they’ll be “okay.”

And yet, that’s not how it works, is it?  Any control I may imagine I have over their “okayness” is purely delusional.  I can’t stop them from getting sick.  I can’t protect them from an awkward fall from the monkey bars.  I can’t prevent a van from blowing a red light and t-boning us as we drive through an intersection.  As much as I may feel that I’m in control, I’m not.  And I never have been.

So what do I do with that knowledge?  Do I cocoon us?  Tether them permanently to my apron strings?  Or do I believe that there is One who is in control and trust that He knows what He’s doing?  If I truly believe that God is all-knowing and all-powerful, do I need to worry about being in control?  Giving up that control and trusting in God doesn’t mean that everything is going to turn out the way I’d choose or that my family and I won’t experience pain.  But it does give me courage to loosen my white-knuckled grip on my children, believing that whatever happens, it will be okay. 

Romans 8:28 says, “And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.”  Again, it doesn’t mean that God is going to bring a pain-free life.  It means that he takes all things — good and bad– and uses them for our benefit.  That’s where I put my trust.

I’m normal! Sort of…

I got my test results back from the three hour glucola test, and they were normal.  Yeah!  I’ll continue on the low-sugar 2K “diet” for the rest of the pregnancy, but they’re not diagnosing me with gestational diabetes.  I’m curious now to see when baby will be born.  With the boys, I gained a lot of weight, which meant they gained a lot of weight, which meant they both came early.  Since I’m probably not going to gain as much, will she come closer to the due date?  Or do I just pop them out early no matter what? 

I also have to say that I was a big baby about the three hour test.  It wasn’t bad at all!  I didn’t get naseous, hungry, or bored.  The nurses were great, and I got to sit and quietly enjoy a book.  I’m thankful for the prayers that were going up for me, because I know God took a possibly unpleasant situation and made it into an easy, relaxing morning.

In which I whine

I go in for my 3 hour glucola test tomorrow morning.  Waiting for 3 hours in the hospital while bored and hungry isn’t sounding like fun right now.  I tried to convince hubby that I didn’t need to go — even if I still show up with high blood sugar, I’ll just end up watching what I eat.  Which is what I’m doing now.  Without taking the loooong test.  Which is why I’m currently eating Cheerios with no honey.

3-D

Our boys spent a few nights with their grandparents over Christmas break, so my husband and I took advantage of the free time to catch a few movies.  (While he had pneumonia.  Because free time is premium stuff!)  We saw Blindside and Avatar.  I went into Avatar with low, low expectations.  I was expecting phenomenal visual effects and a complete lack of plot. 

The visuals were impressive.  But honestly?  I’m not a fan of 3-D.  I find it distracting to wear the 1950’s specs.  They don’t make the movie more enjoyable for me.  Also, they tend to make the movie appear less clear.  It’s not blurry per se.  Instead, it’s almost like I can see part of the frames while looking at the screen.

It seems that 3-D is becoming more popular.  I heard that ESPN is gearing up to unveil a 3-D TV channel.  Ugh!  I hope this turns out to be a phase that quickly passes.  Or that my eyes spread further apart to better match the frames before the next 3-D movie comes out.

Check it out

My husband has unveiled his brand-spankin’-new blog.  In his first post he challenges a view that I (and I think many others) subconsciously held for a long time.  It’s good reading!  Go check it out!

http://purposefulcreation.wordpress.com/